REACTING freezes your choices and shuts down your brain.
RESPONDING opens up your choices and jump starts your creativity.

REACTING creates more problems.

RESPONDING solves problems.

REACTING says things like “Why does this always happen to me?” “This is just not fair” or “This shouldn’t be happening!”
RESPONDING says “I don’t like what is happening, it’s really inconvenient, so how do we best deal with this?”

REACTING escalates an argument and leads to no solutions.

RESPONDING defuses an argument and sets the stage to seek solutions.

REACTING creates anger and distance in relationships.
RESPONDING creates connection and intimacy in relationships.

REACTING keeps you dealing with the same problems over and over, without achieving any long-term solution or elimination of the problem.

RESPONDING allows you to consider the current problem, possible sources of the problem, and the multitude of solutions available when you respond with reasoned creativity.

REACTING demonstrates ignorance, which is applied lack of understanding.

RESPONDING demonstrates wisdom, which is applied understanding and knowledge.

REACTING causes us to act as if we have no knowledge, experience or wisdom.

RESPONDING allows us to use and apply our knowledge, experience and wisdom.

REACTING is the primary cause of road rage and doing really stupid things.
RESPONDING allows you to handle potentially dangerous situations in a way that keeps you safe.

REACTING causes us to say really stupid things to our kids, sometimes even sounding like our own parents. Nothing worthwhile is taught or modeled.

RESPONDING allows us to step back enough to realize that one of the main purposes of parenting is the transfer of values to the next generation.

REACTING causes us to jump into situations without considering the consequences.

RESPONDING allows us to step back, consider the context and all the available options.

REACTING leads to failure. RESPONDING leads to success.

REACTING is a choice. RESPONDING is a much better choice.

Visit secretsofgreatrelationships.com SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.

Each and every one of us has his or her cherished dream. We think about it all the time and do everything possible to realize it. Dream can be a purpose of one’s living and inspire to do a lot of great deeds. Some dream of a quiet life in the country, having a bunch of children and living peacefully till the rest of their days. Someone’s dreams are quite ambitious and eventually they become famous or contribute greatly to the society. But the most certain fact is that everybody wants to travel at least somewhere during their lives. Why do we want to leave our motherland where everything is familiar to see some other wicked places with a completely different culture? Why do our hearts make us go for an adventure?

Every day seems exactly the same to us. Same worries, same duties, same things underhand. It can drive even the most patient and conservative person insane. Wanting more is a quite natural thing for humans. When we get sick and tired of what surrounds us, we long for new impressions and things, to make our lives more interesting. We forget about our duties, belongings, due times, college term papers and take off for the unknown. It can be also characterized as an escape from the society, which stresses you out. Traveling around the globe is an expensive thing, which not everybody can afford. But it doesn’t have to be India or Caribbean where you spend your time resting and getting your thoughts together. You can go to neighboring country and see their culture.

Your being in a completely different surrounding makes you feel better. You forget about all the problems you had, all the arguments you went through, all things that wait for you at home and dive into a completely new world of wonders. You go on excursions that widen your outlook, hang out in different clubs and cafés to communicate with new people or just walk along old streets to get your thoughts together. Traveling is the most exciting thing to do in your free time. This way you get some rest and get to know more not only just for yourself, but for your job or personal life. You can also make friends and use these contacts in your future. But don’t get crazy and decide to spend your vacation in the jungle with some cannibalistic tribe, eating roots and waiting to be eaten.

If you decide to go on a trip plan it carefully and decide what you expect from it: civilized world full of aristocratism and modern conveniences or wild jungle with exciting adventures. Everything depends on how far you can go. This trip can turn your life upside down and can be very helpful to you in some aspects of your life. You can even use your experience in that college term paper you stopped writing. A get away is sometimes necessary, but don’t run away too often; you might lose your contacts close to where you’re settled. But this is another question. Should one get settled at all?

Daniel Hunt has been working as a leading editor at SuperiorPapers.com – superiorpapers.com Custom Research Paper writing service for more than two years. He possesses extensive experience in helping students in writing a proper superiorpapers.com/college_term_paper.php college term paper. superiorpapers.com/college_term_paper.php College term papers written under his guidance, are graded the highest.

I think one of American’s greatest fears is to be homeless…and, it has always been one of my fears as well. And, in recent years…being homeless has happened to me…TWICE!

My down slide, started back in the 1990’s, with SIX job layoffs over a decade or so! And, all my job losses, were for legitimate reasons, such as companies closing; moving out of the country; defense cuts or downsizing, etc. I have never been fired from a job for attitude or attendance problems or anything else!

Millions of people all over the country, over the last decade, have lost their jobs, and I have been one of the more unfortunate ones! It’s an awful feeling to lose a job…that awful empty feeling in the stomach…feels like you got hit in the stomach by Mohammed Ali. I felt like I WAS in the ring with Ali…and being knocked down in the 1st round…the 2nd round…the 3rd round…the 4th…the 5th and almost didn’t get up in the 6th round…after my 6th job loss, etc!

The ups and downs of it all…that hopeless feeling…the stress…the depression that goes with it! An awful time in my life! My age wasn’t helping any, either! All of this happened, when I was turning 50 years of age, and I’m certain ageism (discrimination against older workers) played a part in my downfall, etc. I have no doubt about it, but I could never prove it. During these awful years, I had problems getting a job and/or getting temporary assignments, etc.

It was after my 5th job loss in May, 2004, that things got worse for me, as I had heart problems and a stroke! With no family or support to help me, I found myself facing a judge and got evicted from my apartment…and, for the first time in my life…I was HOMELESS! I never thought something like this could happen to me! “It can’t happen to me, right?”

After suffering the stroke, I was taken by ambulance to the VA Medical Center, where I would spend the next 5 weeks recovering. During this terrible time in my life, I was not able to make arrangements to get my possessions out of my apartment…and I LOST EVERYTHING! All my clothes; computer; tv; all my 25 years of art work…GONE! It was my “Katrina” of 2005, and now I know what the victims of the real “Katrina” felt like when they lost all their possessions! A terrible, empty, hollow feeling! I was depressed and devastated! Now, I would do my shopping at the VA thrift store; or do my shopping in the high-rent district of the Salvation Army or Goodwill, etc.

After my discharge from the hospital, I stayed with a friend for about a month…only to return to the hospital, where I stayed for over 3 months this time. A pace-maker was implanted, and my heart problems continued!

UPDATE: May, 2004. That was the update on my website (humordoctormd) in May, 2004, when I was taken by ambulance to the VA for the first time. And now, as far as my website was concerned, I found myself outside the candy store…looking in! But, at the time, I didn’t know it would be for over 2 1/2 years! Since my website had been downloaded into my computer, I lost it with everything else!

Twenty eight cents on the dresser…and, that was it…and, the clothes on my back! That’s all I had! I felt certain, at the time, that I was going to lose my website for non-payment! After all, it was one of the few things that gave me a little joy in my life! With only 28 cents on the dresser…what was I going to do? At the end of the 3 months of being hospitalized, the VA declared me to be dis-abled and Social Security followed suit. Now, I could look forward to having little money in my pocket to live on. But, as with any government agencies, it would take time.

After I was discharged, I did not have enough money to get a place of my own, so I had to live in a homeless shelter for about six weeks! And yes, for the first time, I ate in a soup line as well! Words cannot express the indignity and embarrassment of having to do something like this! But, on the other hand, I knew I would be coming into some money thru the VA and SS soon, so I knew it would be only a short time, etc. “It can’t happen to me, right?”

Since my website was one of the few things that gave me enjoyment during this time, I managed to keep it open by paying the fees. And, I would go to the public library or community college down the street and check on it month after month! It was inspiring to me, because it did give my great joy…a lot of which was missing in my life during this terrible time!

Obviously, telling a complete story like this one, cannot be done in a short article. So, I have plans to write a book, and tell the whole story, etc. But, after I got paid from the VA and SS, things were a little better for me, as I started to re-build…AGAIN…and AGAIN…and AGAIN! Because I lost all my possessions…I bought a spoon and fork there…a bar of soap there…a paper clip…over here…it was going to take time! But, the thought of getting a computer and getting my website back at the time, was out of the question! “It can’t happen to me, right?”

Little by little, and throughout 2006, I saved my pennies…and FINALLY…with the help of the disability pensions, I got my computer on Thanksgiving week-end of 2006! My website is big…with over 200 pages and over 500 graphics. And, through glassy eyes and with a lump in my throat, I watched the green lights on the modem do its “light show”, as my website took over 20 minutes to download (by phone). I couldn’t believe it was all happening after such a long time…I would be getting my website back soon! YAHOO! Looking at the instructions on the computer screen through glassy eyes didn’t help…but, for the first time in years…I was so excited!

The first thing I did, after I got my website back, was to change the date from May, 2004…to…November, 2006! YAHOO! High-fives for everyone! With faith in the Lord; positive thinking; humor is the best medicine; and a little GOOD luck for a change…I’m back!
SCARY…ISN’T IT?

ARTICLES PUBLISHED: (70 websites/includes links); Direct link: humordoctormd.homestead.com/articlespublished.html humordoctormd.homestead.com/articlespublished.html
Website name; humordoctormd – Over 150 colorful pages; over 300 graphics
humordoctormd.homestead.com humordoctormd.homestead.com
email; mailto:humordoctormd@yahoo.com humordoctormd@yahoo.com
Copyright; Jerry L. Aragon (The Humor Doctor); 2006

Wow, it’s a new year and a new millennium! What a privilege it has been to
come into your homes and offices around the world. Being able to share with
you has been one of my great joys!

As we enter this new millennium, one of the major challenges for all of us
will be to learn to live together on this one planet we all share. Hopefully we will all discover that by living and working together we will all benefit.

I believe America is a great example of this. Guess what has made America
powerful? The blending of many ethnic streams that have come to America over the last 200 years. No country has been such a depository of the gifts of the world like America. For over 200 years, people have come from all over
the world to America, bringing with them their recipes and their food. Their
music and their dance and their artistic ability. The gift of law and the
gift of government. The gift of medicine and the gift of healing. The gift
of religion and the gift of the work ethic.

All of this did not start here. All of it came here from all the countries
of the world. In fact, it is an incredible list – how many people outside
their native countries live in America. The most Japanese outside of Japan
live in America, the most Italians outside of Italy live in America, the
most Koreans outside of Korea live in America, the most Puerto Ricans
outside of Puerto Rico live in America. You can go right down the list,
country after country. The list is so long it’s unbelievable, but that is
what has made America so unbelievably powerful. The contribution of all the
ethnic streams that have been coming here for 200 years is incredible.

We must all now recognize what an incredible opportunity we all have before
us, as this giant planet seems to get smaller all around us. And remember
that it is our diversity that when mixed together can create genius. It is
the combination of the soft sound of the flute and the crash of the cymbals
that make up the brilliant sounds of the symphony orchestra. In our
challenges to learn better how to live together, let us also find new
opportunities to create future genius and miracles in our world and with
each other.

To Your Success,

Jim Rohn

Reproduced with permission from Jim Rohn’s Weekly E-zine.
Copyright 2005 Jim Rohn International. All rights reserved
worldwide. To subscribe to Jim Rohn’s Weekly E-zine, go to
Jim-Rohn.InspiresYOU.com Jim-Rohn.InspiresYOU.com

The arts of being silent and listening are
interconnected. They are also vital to having a happy
and successful life. Here are 15 tips to help you get started.

1. It may be an old proverb, but it is still true:
Silence is golden.

2. One reason silence is worth its weight in gold is
that it prevents arguments. When applied thoughtfully
it can also end them.

3. Listening makes it possible for you to know what
the other person is thinking.

4. Active and interested listening, is a basic form of
respect – one that is universally accepted and appreciated.

5. It does not matter if you believe in Creation or
evolution, one fact remains either way: We have two
ears and one mouth – suggesting we need to listen twice as
much as we speak.

6. Listening to someone else virtually guarantees that
they will listen to what you have to say.

7. Quick thought: It is no coincidence that when
police read a person their Miranda rights the first
thing they say is, “You have the right to remain
silent”.

8. You get into a lot less trouble listening than you
do by talking.

9. People may complain about someone who talks too
much, but when was the last time you heard someone
complain about someone that listens too much?

10. Ask someone how they are doing, then really listen
to their answer.

11. Try talking 25% less than you do now, for the next
10 days.

12. Try listening 50% more than you do now, for the
next 10 days.

13. Pay attention not only to the words people say,
but also to their tone of voice, facial expressions,
and gestures. What are those things saying?

14. You cannot learn if you are the one talking. No
lesson can be imparted to you. The benefits of what
other people know are a treasure that can only be
unlocked with the key of listening.

15. When you listen do not let your mind wander. If
you find yourself thinking about something else ask
the person talking to clarify their previous statement.

And that’s fifteen tips for you. If you find it
difficult to remember a specific tip while talking to
someone, just remember to relax, be polite, and enjoy
listening to what the other person has to say.

Reprint permission for this article is granted when
you include the following: Michael Oksa publishes The
Success Spot, a blog to help you succeed. You can see
for yourself what a difference some positive input can
make when you visit a1successforce.blogspot.com a1successforce.blogspot.com

“Success is waking up in the morning
Whoever you are, however old or young
And bounding out of bed because there’s something out there
That you love to do, that you believe in, that you’re good at …
Something that’s bigger than you are,
And you can hardly wait to get at it again today!”
- WHIT HOBBS.

As I grew up, I remember the TV ad that featured kids saying the usual sweet words: “When I grow up, I would like to be a doctor …. pilot … engineer … et al.” Kids so full of dreams!

Slow Down
One of my friends has been working overtime trying to purchase a car. A very good idea, if you ask me. The problem is that despite starting a profitable business, having a beautiful fiancée and a comfortable abode; this guy still feels like he hasn’t made it in life.
Whereas I admire his burning ambition, I strongly feel that it might consume him. ‘Too much ambition kills a man, too little takes him nowhere’. It’s all about balancing.

Dreams
We all dream of that day when we’ll be successful and have in our possession this and that or a certain level of education. The question that begs asking is, at what point is one considered successful?
To many people, success is achieving their goals. To others, success is that stage in life when they have achieved what their role models have also achieved. Living in a leafy suburb, membership to an exclusive sports club, among other definitions.

Definition
The first step towards realizing one’s dreams is waking up. Not only literally, but even in our mindset. Defining success should be the first step. Going back to primary and secondary school, we realize that every new concept taught was initially defined. Mass was first defined before we discovered that it is the product of density and volume. Most of us do not have a very clear picture of what success means in our lives. We follow what others think, no matter how different their careers and lives are.

Progress
The second reason I am dwelling on these formative stages of our lives is because they offered a discrete way of measuring success. At the end of every term, we would sit exams and get our report cards that gauged progress. At year-end, this would determine whether or not one would progress to the next class.

Looking back, I realize something. This progressive gauging of success and achievement has been lost to many of us. We only feel successful upon achieving some things, usually after a long period of time.
Be reminded that the most important things in life are not things. Can we then feel successful if we acquire intangible things?

Reviews
Instead of looking back like a company does every year, what about monthly or even weekly reviews? Did you effect things that added value to your and others’ lives? Did you manage to do away with a bad habit? Did you improve something at the office? Made a new friend? Learnt something new?
The above seem like little things. I immediately point out that it’s the little things that do count. Anyone who has done discrete math will quite naturally concur on this. We all love to say “Live life one day at a time.” However, we rarely do that.

Priorities
Highly motivated people such as the youth usually have one major problem: trying to achieve so much in so little time. This usually leaves a guy very frustrated. With no specific starting point, many get overwhelmed and just give up.

The simple remedy to this is to get one’s priorities right. First things first as we all say. Crossing bridges only when you get to them. Re-ordering priorities helps one gauge their step and rationally weigh options.

Intelligence
I recently researched on ‘Why Intelligent People Fail’. Following are some of the reasons:
1. Lack of motivation
2. Lack of impulse control
3. Lack of perseverance
4. Fear of failure
5. Procrastination
6. Inability to delay gratification
7. Too little or too much Self-confidence.

The die is now cast and the buck stops at your lap. You have read this far. Judge for yourself based on your experience and understanding.
Come up with what you know to be the true definition of success with regard to your life.

Just a thought: If you think there is good in everybody, you haven’t met everybody yet.

How often does life present you with an opportunity to get mad, or sad? We all live in a reactionary world that causes our emotional state to fluctuate.

How often have you heard someone say, “I wouldn’t be this way if only you weren’t _________ , or didn’t _________. ” Just fill in the blanks with anything that has triggered you in the past.

It may seem to you right now that when something happens you feel powerless to control your reactions. If you tire of having your buttons pushed and being manipulated by influences outside of your control then I urge you to develop self mastery.

Imagine how simple life would be if there were nothing that anyone could do to upset your sense of self. When one becomes master over themselves they are then fully in control of how they react to any situation presented to them. There is nothing in life more freeing than not reacting to another’s negative energy.

There are always going to be happenings in life that are beyond our control. Self Mastery creates self control which gives us the choice of how to react to whatever occurs in our lives.
Our buttons that normally would be pushed will have disappeared.

Let’s all walk through this reactionary world completely un-triggered.

We will be the purveyors of peace.

After years of personal development I had reached an awareness I would
describe as self realization. Some call it enlightenement, yet to me that is
just a word. I am no different from anyone else on this planet.

I achieved this not by living in a monastery away from daily life, I gained
mastery over my mind, body and soul living in the real world. My life now is
very different from the way I lived before.

I can see the beauty in all things and love to coach that part out of people.
It is my beief that everyone has a pure core that longs to have outward
expression in the world.

I live in Toronto and my intention is to shine my light fot all the world to see.

Love and light,

Glenn

yestotruth.com yestotruth.com

mailto:guruglenn@yestotruth.com guruglenn@yestotruth.com

A son and his father were walking in the mountains.

Suddenly, the son falls, hurts himself and screams:

“AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!”

To his surprise, he hears the voice repeating
somewhere in the mountain: “AAAhhhhhhhhhhh!!!”

Curious, he yells: “Who are you?”

He receives the answer: “Who are you?”

Angered at the response, he screams: “Coward!”

He receives the answer: “Coward!”

He looks to his father and asks: “What’s going on?”

The father smiles and says: “My son, pay attention.”

And then he screams to the mountain: “I admire you!”

The voice answers: “I admire you!”

Again the man screams: “You are a champion!”

The voice answers: “You are a champion!”

The boy is surprised, but does not understand.

Then the father explains: “People call this ECHO,
but really this is LIFE. It gives you back everything you say or do. Our life is simply a reflection of our actions. Life will give you back everything you have given to it. “ (Anonymous)

Your life is not a coincidence. It’s a reflection of you! Proverbs declares, “As a man thinks, so is he, and as a man chooses, so is he.” If you would like to know who is responsible for most of your troubles, take a look in the mirror. If you could kick the person responsible for most of your problems, you wouldn’t be able to sit down for three weeks. It’s time for us to stay out of our own way.

Stop looking only at where you are and start looking at what you can be. Be careful of where your mind wanders; your words and actions follow it.

No one can defeat you unless you first defeat yourself. Self-image sets the boundaries and limits of each of our individual accomplishments. If you doubt yourself, listen to Alexander Dumas: “A person who doubts himself is like a man who enlists in the ranks of his enemy and bears arms against himself.”

You carry with you the world in which you must live. Know this: when you have a great dream, your mind will be your biggest enemy. Remember you are your own doctor when it comes to curing cold feet, a hot head and a stuffy attitude.

You may succeed if nobody else believes in you, but you will never succeed if you don’t believe in yourself. Whatever you attach consistently to the words “I am,” you will become.

- John Mason, from the book Imitation is Limitation (Want to purchase this book? Go to www.freshword.com/resources)

John Mason is a national best-selling author, nationally recognized speaker and book coach. You can visit his site at freshword.com/signup freshword.com/signup to receive this nugget and ones just like it in your email inbox every week. Very inspiring!

You’ve probably heard the phrase, “Idle hands are the devil’s tools” — meaning if you don’t have something to keep you busy, you’re likely to get into trouble. That can be argued of course, since the intent to cause trouble probably has to be present also.

However, the concept itself does hold some truth regarding what we create in our lives. If it’s true that we get back what we put out (into the universe), then it’s easy to see why “idle hands” would be a bad thing for us. Life on this planet is an exercise in creating our own reality. Moment to moment, we are making decisions. Whether we act or don’t act, we are putting forth our intent.

Every action has a consequence, either good or bad. Remember the concept, “like attracts like.” Imagine that every bit of energy you put out is traveling the universe, gathering similar energy, and eventually being returned right back to you. It makes you think more carefully about what type of energy you are putting out every day, doesn’t it? If we do nothing, we get nothing back (or at least nothing very good). Our lives become boring, empty shells. The very act of not moving, not doing, not creating causes stagnation.

Does that mean that as long as we keep busy, we’ll have lots of prosperity and joy? Not necessarily. Remember that we need to focus our intent on what we’re creating. We need to engage in the act of conscious creation every day, putting out positive, purposeful energy. What we get back is more positive energy, more abundance and more joy.

Conscious creation means thinking about what you want to do with your time, moment to moment. There are 24 hours in a day — 1,440 minutes — 86,400 seconds. Some of it has to be put aside for work, sleep, family, errands, housework, and the like. What are you doing with the rest of that time? Are you wasting it on mindless pursuits, or focusing it into purposeful activities? I’m not referring to just hobbies here, either. This is a process that can be applied to every aspect of our lives. Whether we have a lot of time to devote to hobbies or not doesn’t matter. What matters is that we consciously focus our intent on building our circumstances, one minute at a time.

Some of us live our lives on autopilot. It’s not that we don’t want to do anything, we just don’t know what to do. We have no direction, no passion, no purpose to work toward. We get up each morning, go to work, come home and lose ourselves in the television for the rest of the night. In the process, we are creating more of the same stagnant energy. If this describes you, it’s time to shake things up! Develop some passions. Get excited about something. Turn your idle hands into busy hands and create something magical. The very act of moving will put energies into motion and begin pulling more favorable circumstances into your life.

Keep in mind this is a cumulative process and it takes time to fully transform your circumstances. One day of activity and purpose won’t change everything around. Remember that you probably have months or years of stagnant energy built up that has resulted in your life the way it is today. By consistently working at it and keeping that positive energy in motion, it will begin to feed on itself and create even more positivity.

Wendy Betterini is an inspirational writer who strives to motivate, uplift, and inspire you to make your dreams a reality. Visit her website, WingsForTheHeart.com WingsForTheHeart.com for more positive thoughts to help you on your journey.

She was just a head of me in the check-out line of a department store. In her arms she held a bright purple throw rug. Her feet were shod in shiny purple shoes, from her wrist there hung a matching purple purse. A purple pull over completed the ensemble. I took a risk and asked her, “Do you like purple.” “I sure do,” she said with as big a smile as I have ever seen. Her eyes twinkled when she said, “They call me the purple princess.” “Who are ‘they,’” I asked. “The people I visit,” was her answer. She went on to tell me that she was a hospice volunteer. She spent three days each week going to the homes of terminally ill patients to help with household matters, clean, prepare food, or just visit. “I have more fun doing it. I dress in purple to brighten their days.” “You sure brightened my day,” I said. “Great!” she said with that broad grin as she left the store.

I didn’t get her name. To me she is and will remain The Purple Princes. She is a smile spreader, a grin reaper. She spreads her smile as seeds and reaps the grins she sows. I don’t think it is a coincidence that she does the work of hospice. Those who are terminally ill confirm for those who aren’t our own mortality. “Old or young, we’re on our last cruise,” wrote Robert Louis Stevenson. Though we don’t dwell on it, the awareness can help keep things in perspective. It keeps us mindful of the value of each day and that truly makes a difference.

John Gardner once said, “There are men and women who make the world better just by being the kind of people they are.” The Purple Princess, this marvelous grin reaper is the perfect example.
Today is a great day to sow smiles and reap grins…..
Let’s do

jimgustafson.com jimgustafson.com