The Law of Can’t

You cannot achieve a goal that you do not have. That sounds so obvious, but we so easily forget it. We have wishes, desires, or dreams, but then don’t turn them into goals. And then we wonder why we don’t make progress toward our wishes, desires, and dreams.

The Law of Dreams

It’s been said that “a goal is a dream with a deadline.” One of the keys to successfully achieving goals is to have a deadline that other people know about. This will help hold you accountable. And then if you really want to change your life, achieve the goal before the deadline.

The Law of One at a Time

When you are first learning how to set and achieve goals, it’s best to start out with just one. This will allow you to:

focus on one goal at a time
avoid getting overwhelmed
experience the success of achieving a goal
build momentum for the next goals

Remember, we all have to walk before we run. As you strengthen your goal setting muscles, you’ll be ready to add more and work on several at the same time.

The Law of “Too Many”

Mark Victor Hansen, author of “Future Diary” encourages people to have “too many goals.” Having an abundance of goals encourages our mind to be more and more creative in finding ways to reach all the goals.

The Law of Ink

“The dullest ink is stronger than the sharpest memory.”

In other words, write your goals down. Commit them to paper. Writing them down means tells your brain that you are serious.

The Law of Slipping

This is where lots of folks begin to lose sight of their goals. No matter how much we want to change something, it’s human nature that we will slip up now and then. The danger when we slip up is to say “Well, I blew. I might as well just give up.” Wrong. You fell off the horse, brush your self off and get back on it. This leads to……..

The Law of Action

Never leave the place where you set a goal without taking some action toward it. This prevents the number one goal stealer, procrastination from setting in and creates momentum toward your goal.

The Law of Celebration

Remember that one of the most important tasks in life is to enjoy what you have achieved. When you meet a goal, have a goal celebration. Besides having fun, celebration builds momentum to set and get more goals.

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“How can I be more successful in life?” is a question that we all ask ourselves from time to time. People who have a burning need or desire to make change ask this question often and urgently.

More enlightened success seekers know…

“Failing to Plan is Just Planning to Fail”

Imagine for a moment that you are cast adrift in a tiny boat in the middle of the ocean. No-one knows you are there, you have no radio or means of communication, no map or compass to guide you, no food no water and only enough fuel for the engine to get you to the nearest land. If you’re going to survive you need to get to land – and fast.

But what are your chances of success? Unless you know exactly where you are going they aren’t great are they?

You might get lucky and get picked up by a passing ship or come across an inhabited island.

…or more likely not. You might end up on a tiny barren speck of land in the middle of the ocean. Or even worse just end endlessly going round in circles until your fuel runs out.

Can you see how this relates to being successful in your life? If you don’t have a plan, you are going to be adrift on the ocean life without a map and compass and only limited time and energy to get to where you want to go.

The chances are you’re going to end up frantically going round in circles through life. You won’t reach the destination you want to reach, maybe you’ll end up somewhere you don’t want to be or even worse get absolutely nowhere.

Planning Helps You In So Many Ways

Now that you know that you need to plan, you should realise that it can help you in so many ways that once you’ve got a plan you’re not going to know how you ever managed without one. Here’s a few of the things that planning can do for you…

You become focussed on your goal. Knowing where you are going and what it looks like will draw you magnetically towards your destination. This is a virtuous circle – to plan you need to focus on your goal, planning will re-enforce that focus.

Your plan will have a pathway that will take you step by step to your goal. This will break a seemingly enormous and impossible task down into a lot of achievable steps that you know you can manage.

You should make sure you absolutely believe in the pathway to your goal. If you don’t, you run the risk that the next great offer or the next fad diet or whatever the latest craze is will come along and distract you.

Developing a well thought out plan lets you do a dry run of how you are going to get to your goal. Like any dry run you can foresee problems and make sure you have solution before they even happen.

Your plan should have steps along the way, with clear dates and times when you’re going to finish them. Each of these steps is like a mini goal that you are going to commit yourself to. Make sure that each one is challenging but achievable. They will let you know you’re going somewhere… you are no longer adrift.

Your plan will let you see how much you have achieved as you look back over it. Every time you make a significant achievement you can celebrate your success! It doesn’t matter if someone else seems to be much better than you, you know you’ve come a long way and you deserve that reward.

Plans Are Living Documents

As you work your plan you will have a clear idea of where you are going next. You will be moving forward taking it one step at a time until you arrive exactly as your goal just as you planned. You’ll sail past pitfalls and obstacles effortlessly…

…WAIT A MINUTE !!! Life is just not like that is it?

We’ve all heard that old saying from the famous Scottish poet Robert Burns “the best laid plans of mice and men oft go awry” (I think he said it a bit differently, but that’s how I’ve heard it:-) )

Meaning that all plans will go wrong… and yes he was right, they all go wrong, often at the first encounter with reality.

So why bother planning if it’s going to go wrong? Aren’t you just wasting your time.

No No No !!!

If you’ve got a plan, you have already thought out how you are going to get there, you have a clear pathway…

…and now you can use all of that information to figure out how you’re going to get round the obstacle, solve the problem that’s in your way.

Even better, if you run into one of those new opportunities that promises to get you there in double quick time, you can use your plan to see if it is really going to help you or not. If you’re convinced it will help you get to your goal faster/more easily then fantastic, you’ve just saved time and effort! If not you’ll know that this latest and greatest opportunity just wasn’t right for you.

As you work your plan, you are going to learn a lot about yourself and the goal you are trying to reach. You should make appointments with yourself to look at your plan regularly (hint: professional managers make these appointments or “review meetings” part of their plan). Don’t be afraid to revise your plan in the light of what you know.

Maybe you’ll find you’ve fallen into the common trap of being overambitious about the steps in your plan. You’re going to have to be patient and allow a bit longer to get to your goal. Either allow a bit longer for each step or take smaller steps.

Maybe you’ve overestimated the difficulties and planned on taking too many steps. Great, then you can get to your goal faster.

Maybe, you’ll find you’ve missed some vital step out. Put it in and adjust your plan…

Whatever happens, DO NOT ABANDON YOUR PLAN!!!!

I know you’re smart enough to have go the idea by know, so I’ll wrap up now.

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Today’s workplace produces plenty of stress. Life’s little hassles mount up until you say to yourself, “If one more thing goes wrong today, I’ll explode.” Don’t reach for the aspirin bottle, try these stress management tips.

Can we eliminate the stressors of modern work life? No. The trick is learning how to manage the stress versus being overwhelmed by it. Here are seven stress management tips

Know the enemy.

What, exactly, is stressing you out? Is it your job? Your home life? Your relationships? Without knowing the root of the problem, you are unlikely to resolve it.

Share the load.

Delegate whenever possible. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking you are the only person who can do the job right. Your coworkers and boss might start to buy into that concept as well.

Get a fresh outlook.

Whoops! I made a mistake. Okay. The world is not going to come to an end. Stress often comes from taking yourself and the job too seriously.

Be a kid again…play.

Put your job concerns aside for five minutes and concentrate on something of fun. Use your break time to work a crossword puzzle, play a quick game of Frisbee, listen to some good music, etc. A few minutes spent playing brings renewed energy to the job.

Let go.

Recognize the difference between the things you can control and the things you cannot. Make a list of these two categories. Stop stressing about the things in your job you have no control over.

Develop a tough skin.

Try not to personalize any criticism you receive. Look at negative comments as constructive criticism that allows you to improve your work.

Don’t make work your life.

Job stress builds when our minds are constantly focused on work. Strive for balance in your life. Make time for family, friends, hobbies and, most importantly, fun.

You man need to giveyour job the heave-ho. You know it’s time to quit when:

You’ve tried all the appropriate channels and methods for resolving your situation, to no avail.
You are not challenged and so bored that you hate to go to work every day.
Your boss is intimidating, disrespectful or demeaning to you.

Stress is a fact of life, but it need not be a way of life. Every job has stress. It is an inevitable consequence of living and working with others. Effective stress managers know how to reduce the harmful effects while retaining the energy and creativity needed to work and live in a stressful environment.

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In the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy say, “Toto, I have a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore”. Well business, government and community leaders, Marcia says, “It’s no longer business as usual anymore; its business that has to better than usual.”

Do you want to be better than usual? Then subscribe to Making Waves! a free monthly e-newsletter with quick lessons on better, faster, smarter ways to lead. Sign up now at LeadersAtAllLevels.com LeadersAtAllLevels.com and get a 35 page bonus e-book: Make Bold Change! 101 Ways to Stomp Out Business As Usual. Or contact Marcia directly at 800-971-7619.

Anger management counseling is a necessary part of many individual’s lives. It is important to realize that anger management is something that happens to millions. They just lose control; they just can not handle what is happening. Or, they just get so mad that something just has to give. No matter what happens or how it happens, those that lose control of their anger need to consider seeking out the help of anger management counseling.

Why Invest In Counseling?

For many people, the fact that they need to invest in anger management counseling is something that is bothersome. Why can’t they just get themselves under control? That is a problem that many of those suffering with anger management problems have to face. The important thing for you to realize is that this is a condition that is serious and is uncontrollable. They do not try nor do they want to be this angry. It happens because they are pushed, frustrated or stressed to the max.

Even more so, what eventually happens in the angry outburst also is not controllable. No matter how much it would be beneficial for them to be able to just turn if off, they can not do that. That is why anger management counseling is one of the best ways that people can control what is happening to them. As a parent, teen anger management should be counseled as soon as possible.

What Good Does Counseling Do?

Another mistaken theory is that anger management counseling is not worthwhile. It can be, or it may not be. The fact is that no two people are the same. Most of those that enter counseling will learn anger management techniques to help them to ultimately control what is happening in their lives. This is not something that we all can accomplish, but even just learning a few things can drastically improve their lives.

Counseling for anger management will provide tips and techniques for everyday use. It will help them to learn what is truly triggering the outburst and how to handle situations that infuriate them. It is not something that can be learned on your own, though. If you have a loved one facing anger management problems, seeking out the help of anger management counseling can be the best thing for them.

If you are the person that is facing anger management problems, working with a counselor is an ideal way to learn how to deal with these problems. The fact is that if you do not, things will just get worse for you through the long run. If you work with anger management techniques that you will be taught, it can be amazingly beneficial to the entire outlook that you have on your life. Anger management counseling is available through doctor’s, through your employer possibly, and possibly through your community.

Sandy Sizemore writes on many consumer related topics including mental health. You can find mentalhealthconsumerguide.com/anger-management.html anger management counseling and mentalhealthconsumerguide.com/index.html anger management techniques and more by visiting our mental health website.